"Wives are to honor and respect and follow their husband's lead, not to tell their husband how he ought to be a better husband. When each person gets their part right, regardless of how their spouse is treating them, there is hope for real change in their marriage."
That's advice from actor Kirk Cameron, who was recently interviewed by the Christian Post. Cameron is currently on a tour called "Love Worth Fighting For," a Bible-based event intended "to strengthen and encourage your marriage."
"A lot of people don't know that marriage comes with instructions," Cameron told reporter Samuel Smith. "And, we find them right there in God's word."
Smith writes that in his remark about honor and respect for husbands, Cameron may have been referring to the words from Colossians 3:18-19, which states: "Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them."
Cameron, an evangelical Christian, was a teen star in the 1980s sitcom "Growing Pains." More recently he has starred in Christian films such as "Fireproof" and "Saving Christmas." He is married with six children.
Cameron offered the Christian Post some other advice about marriage:
Thinking that you are going to win an argument, you end up losing. It's a no-win situation. In order for you to win, your husband or wife has to lose. When they lose, you have not built up your marriage. You have really cut them down. When couples start arguing and fighting in front of the kids, dad cuts mom and mom cuts dad and the kids bleed. They see that and it damages them. When the kids get to marriage, they will follow patterns that they see...
What most people do is they try to blame their spouse and say, "Hey, I would be a great husband if it weren't for my wife. We would have a great marriage if it wasn't for my husband." This talks to the importance of getting your own part right. There is only one person on the whole planet who you can change and it's not your spouse...
We talk about faith in God. We talk about the heart of the problem in marriage. We talk about what it means to love your wife in a practical way and what it means to honor your husband. It is possible to fireproof your marriage. Fireproof doesn't mean that the fire will never come, it means when the fire comes and the heat is high, you will be able to withstand it.